(Read: ~12 minutes)
Any conversation about Bohemia invariably leads to Wildberry, the popular lead singer of the Dewberrys, an act discovered at the first open mic night hosted by La Bohème and represented thereafter by Connie Nelson, who, working through various partnerships formed with La Bohème, develops, distributes and promotes numerous forms of entertainment, some aimed at kids, though not exclusively consumed by the prepubescent demographic.
Without a doubt, the most financially successful content in this category features the Dewberrys.
Wildberry quickly assumed the group’s leading role. The band’s official backstage merchandise catalog encourages fans of Wildberry to buy t-shirts plastered with her made up face, sleep in her soft pajamas, carry her around on backpacks and share snacks stored in Wildberry lunch boxes. There’s also a mobile Dewberrys game available in your favorite app store where you can choose your own adventure and select any of the band’s members to represent your player character. Teaming up with Connie and La Bohème made Wildberry incredibly popular and rich. Her popularity meant the exclusive content she produced for the launch of BohoCoin almost single handedly guaranteed its success among her rabid fan base, aged two to ninety-two.
In the name of research, I sat down with a beer to watch a couple of episodes of the twenty four minute long Dewberrys Adventure Show. The production obviously stars the Dewberrys and a menagerie of anthropomorphic animal friends who join the band for exploits, ostensibly aimed at learning the ways of Bohemia, the visions of La Bohème and the philosophies of Dr. Gaston.
Some algorithm chose the first episode for me, called Gene’s Submarine, in which The Dewberrys take a submarine ride into the ocean’s depths with their friend Gene, a three-toed sloth played by an actor in a plushie costume.
Wildberry leads the gang, dressed in typically colorful costumes, who follow her lead throughout the episode.
“Permission to come aboard, Captain?” Wildberry asks Gene.
“Sure you can, I’ve been excited all day for our voyage to the bottom of the sea.”
The band steps into the submarine, a rectangle formed by a stack of boxes with three bean bags placed in the middle, each matching a color worn by a member of the band.
“Take a seat Dewberrys. We’re about to submerge.”
The characters scamper around hurriedly for several playful seconds longer than necessary. Once they’re settled, Wildberry speaks up.
“Gene, your submarine is sleek and long, but why do we need one to go under water?” she asks. The camera closes in on Huckleberry and Mulberry, who shrug, silently indicating they’ve no idea either.
“The water creates a force which we can’t survive without the sub,” Gene answers. “We’d be crushed to death by the water’s pressure without it.”
The camera cuts to all three Dewberrys huddled together, shaking in fear. Gene tells the gang the sub will protect everybody on board, and the band looks content again.
“We’re going underwater now, Dewberries,” the sloth captain says. The camera cuts to the band again, catching them taking a deep breath and holding their noses.
“Just breathe normally, my friends,” Gene says and the band all let out a deep sigh.
“Wow, look at all the fish,” Wildberry says, pretending to look out the submarines’ portholes by making circles with their hands around their faces.
“How come the fish don’t need a submarine?” Wilberry asks the sloth.
“They’re built differently than us, in order to survive in the water, specialized machines in a way. And their brains work better underwater than ours do. Yet, those fish can’t live on dry land, and we do great. Up there, we can see, hear, smell, taste and touch, all the while processing the information in our brains, our own biocomputers.”
Wildberry pretends to fix her hair and says, “Our biocomputers deserve a song, huh boys?”
The guys agree by giving a thumbs up and moving towards their musical instruments while Wildberry grabs a güiro to scrape along with the rhythm.
Think about your biocomputer,
running the programs of your life.
From all you believe, to all you do,
Some old, some new.
The source of both love and strife.
“Thanks for the song Dewberrys!” Gene says while clapping his front six toes together. “We acquire and use information from disparate sources, obscuring where every thought and sensation comes from and why. There’s a chance we forgot experiences and we have characteristics from places we’ve never been. Our biocomputers can store data so deep we can’t access the information without help, the same way we need this submarine to go to the bottom of the ocean,” the sloth says.
“The fellas came up with an idea how we can get those memories out,” Wildberry says while the camera cuts to Huckleberry and Mulberry holding giant prop hammers.
Gene laughs. “Smashing and breaking won’t be necessary. There’s better techniques to getting at memories we’ve forgotten,” the sloth says.
The guys grumpily put the giant hammers down with a look of disappointment.
“How do we get inside our minds to the memories we forgot?” Wildberry asks Gene.
“You go exploring with conversation, submerging to the depths of your mind,” answers the sloth.
“Wow! It’s mind boggling to think talking can help open my mind and go exploring the hiding places of all your forgotten memories.” Wildberry puts her hand up to her ears. “Can you hear another song, fellas?” she asks her bandmates who nod and start playing their instruments.
This is a song we once forgot,
a tune we used to play.
Back then, we sounded slightly different,
than the way we do today.
We sang the song before,
in places we are not.
The song stays a part of us,
though we once forgot.
“Wonderfully put Dewberrys. I’m sure glad you played the forgotten song. Makes me think about how we don’t always remember where we come from and why,” Gene says.
“We come from Dewville because we’re Dewberrys” Wildberry replies. The camera cuts to Huckleberry and Mulberry waving orange and blue sports pennants with the name of their hometown.
“Yes, of course. And Dewville is a fine place, and where you get your wonderful musical gifts. For the rest of us, wherever our gifts come from, they’re ours now,” Gene says. “And we must use our abilities the best we can.”
Wilberry pretends to look out the portico again. “The fish always look so smart.”
Her bandmates hold up a joke on poster board signs reading THEY’RE ALWAYS … IN SCHOOLS. The pun makes Wildberry giggle and she hugs the band members.
At that point, Gene points out they’ve reached the bottom of the ocean. The band peers through their circle hands again.
“There’s no light down here,” Wilberry says. “Even telling what’s right in front of us is tough.” The guys pull out flashlights and temporarily blind each other, instead of seeing out of the sub.
“Keeping an open mind helps you explore and understand your own programs,” the sloth says. “But leave the fortune telling to the professionals.”
Wildberry responds, “How will we recognize what matters?”
“Matters to whom, the fish swimming outside the submarine?” Gene asks. “What you do will never matter to those fish. They’re worried about their own fishy behavior. Only you can determine what matters, if you matter.”
Wildberry pushes her lower lip out to pout. “Do we even matter?”
“Maybe not to everyone,” the sloth replies. “Except there are several Dewberrys who certainly care about you.” Huckleberry and Mulberry enthusiastically agree and hug Wildberry again. “Bet there’s plenty back in Dewville, too.” The guys nod. Wildberry breaks into a tune acapella.
I only want to know,
in the future,
love persists.
Just between us,
and everyone else.
A force no one resists.
When she’s finished singing, the rest of the submarine’s passengers applaud her song. Then she addresses Captain Gene. “We’ve seen enough of the ocean floor today,” she says. The camera cuts to her band, snoring in the bean bags. The scene fades to black, then credits roll over a cartoon style drawing of the band.
The next episode, Penny’s Rocket, began to play automatically. In it, a space traveling terrapin named Penny builds a quantum spacecraft and invites the Dewberrys to join her on a trip around the cosmos. The band “boards” a plywood platform and sits down while Penny, an actor wearing a costume of green face paint, tights and a foam shell hugging their crotch like a wrestling onesie, takes their place next to the ship’s control panel, concocted of flashing Christmas lights and an old steering wheel.
“Welcome aboard Dewberrys. We can go anywhere in the universe riding my quantum rocket,” Pilot Penny says, waving their hand towards the world of make believe. “Where should we go?”
“Gosh, I don’t know, the universe stretches further than we can see,” Wildberry slumps and sighs, looking at her bandmates for suggestions. They’re no help, offering only shrugs.
Wildberry perks up and grabs a piece of poster board adorned with a painted yellow light bulb. “I’ve got an idea. How about we go all the way across to the other side? We’ve never been over there before,” she says.
“You want to go all the way across the universe?” Penny confirms.
“Yeah!” all of the Dewberrys shout, nodding and shaking their bright, wig-covered heads in agreement.
“OK, I’m happy to take you. Let’s fire up the rockets,” Penny replies then moves a few levers back and forth. The camera shakes, then the turtle turns back to our heroes. “Hold on Dewberrys … three, two, one … blast off!”
The camera cuts to the band swaying back and forth, holding onto their chairs for dear life.
Pilot Penny starts to talk again once the hectic launch subsides into smooth space travel. “We’re on the way across the universe now, Wildberry.”
“Great! We’re excited to finally go.”
“Don’t be sure you haven’t already been there before. In fact, you may already be there right now, for a million years already.”
Wildberry squishes her nose and lips in a pronounced expression of doubt and crosses her arms in defiant annoyance. Her bandmates hold up cardboard question marks.
“Pilot Penny, we’re confused,” Wildberry says. Huckleberry and Mulberry look worried and confused, still holding their question marks.
“All the particles created at the same time by the universe stay connected, no matter where anything winds up, simple really.”
The camera cuts to a shot of the three musicians with a completely lost look on their collective faces.
“Allow me to illustrate my point,” Penny requests, then goes on to explain quantum entanglement with a novelty size coin and a nearby table. “Turns out the material used to mint two coins can be entangled at the most fundamental level of existence. Even if one winds up all the way across the universe, the coins stay connected in what we consider strange ways.”
Penny holds up the giant plastic novelty coin for observation.
“Think of two entangled coins, the one here and one just like it, minted at the same time, from the same material, owned all the way across the universe. Now, once one starts spinning, like this,” Penny says, spinning the coin along its edge on top of the table. “When we spin our coin, the matching coin starts spinning, too. What if, all of a sudden, you slam your hand down on the coin closest to us?” Pennys asks while smashing the prop. “You lift your hand and notice the coin landed heads up. Incredibly, all the way across the universe, the entangled coin stopped spinning and also landed heads up, just like ours.”
“Weird,” Wildberry offers a deep assessment.
“Yes, and to make the situation weirder, imagine the coin all the way across the universe existed a million years ago, but not today.”
“Whoa,” the Dewberrys say in unison.
“Or perhaps the coin will only exist in a million years from now,” Penny finishes.
Cut to another shot of the dumbfounded explorers. Then another closeup on Wilberry.
“Everyone knows you can’t touch an object all the way across the universe,” she says.
“You don’t need to touch the far away coin to affect it,” Penny answers. “When you knock over your own coin, you knock over the coin all the way across the universe at the exact same time, instantaneously.
“Wow, your coins sure are magical,” Wildberry says.
“Not really,” Penny replies. “Quantum theory says entanglement is a common phenomena throughout the universe, connecting coins, people, everything. Pieces of you could already be across the universe, part of another cosmic entity.
“Far out,” Wilberry says and the rest of the band agrees.
“Totally,” Penny agrees. “Will you sing about the connection between people?” The band obliges and takes up their spots behind their musical instruments while Wildberry sings lead and jingles a tambourine.
Spread across the universe,
laughing and crying,
me and you.
Affecting one another,
without even trying,
is what we do.
Locked into a reality,
no point denying.
Each of us,
part of an entity.
Forever living and dying.
“Bravo, bravo,” Pennys says when the Dewberries finish their song. “You explained the interlock between people and their connection to the universe perfectly. Now let’s continue on our journey of fun and exploration across the cosmos.”
Pilot Penny operates the controls for the rocket, continuing their journey transversing the universe and the band resumes lounging in their lawn chairs.
“Wow, Penny, we really do appreciate you explaining entanglement to us. Thinking about how people interlock in the same way boggles my mind. Imagine being connected with a hundred, a thousand, a million different people,” Wildberry says, then makes a silly face over a BOING! sound effect.
“We’re almost to our destination across the universe,” Penny says.
“The quantum rocket sure does move fast to get us all the way across the universe in a few minutes,” Wildberry responds. “But how? We thought nothing moves faster than light.”
Huckleberry raises a piece of posterboard stating Speed of light while Mulberry holds one reading =186,282 miles per hour.
“You’re right guys,” the turtle says. “Except the quantum rocket runs on the fundamental building blocks of the universe, so it doesn’t follow the same rules you expect. From a quantum point of view, the concept of speed doesn’t exist because there’s no concept of time, no past, present or future.
After the turtle explains the relevance of time in quantum mechanics, the Dewberrys stand up and play another song, reiterating the lesson just discussed about the relativity of time.
Moving,
without forwards or backwards.
Spanning an unimaginable space,
a lovely and strange place.
Bouncing around a lack of time.
Headed towards nothing,
in front or behind.
Worlds of maybe,
not yes or no,
black and white turned gray.
Moving,
without forwards and backwards.
It’s the only way.
“Magnificent! Loved it!” the tortoise bellowed in response. “And just in time because we’ve arrived all the way across the universe.”
The Dewberrys follow Penny off the platform to depart the rocket ship. Men and women dressed in business suits move in front and behind the strange visitors from the rocket ship.
“What a hectic place,” Wildberry says. “What did you say it’s called?”
“Earth, by the people who live here,” Penny answers.
“The folks on Earth sure do look busy,” Wildberry says. “What are they looking for? Maybe we can help find it,” the singer says. Huckleberry and Mulberry nod in agreement.
“Such a considerate thought, Wildberry, but each of them must decide and find what’s needed for themselves,” the wise turtle responds.
“So their needs all vary?”
“Yes, remember no one else shares our exact life and we all possess the ability to form personal perspectives, our beliefs become real in a sense. Correct from their own perspective but wrong from others.”
The Dewberrys break out another song to hammer home the rocket episode’s final points.
Your truth is a dream to them,
and their dreams become real.
We believe what we accept,
focusing on how we feel.
Avoid the life someone else has given,
question what is true.
Find your own perspective,
deep inside of you.
After the song, Wildberry addresses their space traveling friend. “Pilot Penny, we love traveling on your rocket ship across the universe to this planet called Earth. But the band needs a nap,” she says. The scene cuts to a shot of the guys wearing old fashioned sleeping caps and holding fluffy pillows. The camera returns to a closeup of Wildberry and she says, “We’re ready to head back home to Dewville.”
The space going crew reboard their platform for the trip back and the episode credits roll.
Arlo Gust 